This post is not complete. I just needed to first write down the few things and the memories came slowly. I guess I’ll tackle the whole issue later but in the meantime, if you were here, you know exactly what I mean. By the way, I was there btwn 87′ and 92′. E&OE !
Now for as much as I hated this school, I can obviously say, I got the necessary academic achievements I needed to get. All was not in vain. Got me to a national school but really messed me and a whole lot of others psychologically.
Food:-
Utone, uche, boot, kisanga, ladha ya punda, Moe, tibay ( and din-day-ka the cup that held the tibay). that wasnt even tea! just colored water. How many cows did that school have!
The school uniform:
Safari boots (whoever thought of that, was bright otherwise, Kiwi would have made profit from the dust we would have had to deal with polishing regular black shoes) those avunjas were however expensive and depending on how economically stable your family was, I know a lot of people who wore the same pair for atleast 2 years. Full of viraka’s. I remember one guy who we nicknamed “Bismark”. He shonad my vunjas whenever they chekad (after playing those jwala balls), green sweaters (this was the ugliest part of the uniform, light blue shirts (looked mzuri but the dust in Naivasha really formed an ugly line by the colar), grey khaki shorts (another good idea- good for kausharing those vibokos, bad idea for washing: -took forever to dry and for those guys that used to have small bladders and couldnt wait for break, you know the circles that were so distinct-they could be seen from far away), navy blue tie and obviously a pair of white sneakers, (bata bullets or power). As a rule you needed three of each (clothes) but the weirdest rule- every opening day was a Clean shaven head ! (Mahabusu kabisa). I can honestly say that even after I left the school, I had no desire to keep long hair mpaka wa leo!
The tall cactus fence. hahaha I dont even know what to say about this. Yaani … you either place a bench on the nguna and run over to the other side (and u wont be able to come back) or you had to wait for the small back gate where all those cows used to pass by and crawl under the gate. Kweli maisha.
Miscellaneous
Ulo- closing day, I can still remember counting those days till I get out of the place. I also clearly remember sleeping on my clothes for two to three weeks zipate mkunjo since there were no ironing boards or irons. completely white washed “power” and to hell with moe that morning. I used to “sell” mine. I also remember singing “parapanda italia parapanda” in the hall. The gimmick was to make us sound louder in excitement as our folks patiently waited to take us home. I remember some of us were picked up and others went home by themselves. Ma3’s made some booming business even mkoko’s (mikokotenis) came to help beba those metal boxes to the stage. Once in a Ma3, was always so eager to get to Nai and the only time u noticed it moving slow was when it was climbing the hill btwn Kinungi and Fly Over. Undoubtfully the best day of the term. Everyone looked forward to it.
Mbokyo, Vietnam- yuma ya staff room,- worst day for anyone. I remember we had a few mbokyos and after each round we were told to run a lap in the field- ati matako itakua softer and ready for round two, kumbe it was for the teachers to restock the canes and also to get some break coz caning a bunch of boys was their way of working out. Depending on the mbokyo, sometimes u’d strip off the sweater, other teachers who hated disliked some students would be stripped to their “commie”. The wrath was definately painful. I will never forget one that really took almost a week to heal and that was just b4 KCSE. Somehow the headi went to visit his family on a Fri and the teachers decided that we’d be beaten by some school called St. Mary’s. (Most of us didnt even know if such a school ever existed but all we were told was that girls are never supposed to beat boys in Maths). First we each faced the wrath of the individual math teachers in class. Somehow it escalated and we were all told to go behind the staffroom. On the way to the staffroom, I must have said 10 to 12 “Hail Marys” but God didnt hear my prayers. Then the war began. Martin M…. who most of us regarded as a timid guy led us. (He rarely had beef with anyone and we expected the first bodies (they know themselves) to lead us lakini wapi, Martin was the first to start the onslaught. The rest of us followed just like sheep. Ever seen how soccer players line up to greet the opposing team when a match is done, now that is how it started only that we were the ones now approaching each teacher who is armed with one or two canes ready to strike. When the first round was through, we were told to take a lap in the field. My a$$ was so heavy from the swelling but we had to run because one of those crazy teachers said the last person would receive another 10 canes. Somehow we made it and then the second onslaught began. This time, we were separated in groups in terms of how u normally perform. Twas heartening to hear some guys being clobbered by all teachers ati coz they were always last or close to being last academically. When all this was happening, most of us were told to lie down flat on our bellies and not look up. Ukichungulia ole wako! Somehow we all managed to survive the mbokyo’s and to an extent that made us brothers. It reminds me that after going thru’ that school anywhere else I went and told my colleagues I was in Naivasha, they’d respect me. Others thought my parents were nuts, others thought I was a man because each time u described to them a beating they could not understand how we survived. The one thing that mbokyo made us was harden us. U could not beat information out of any of us. It hardened us so badly that when we left that school, we realized the special meaning of “FREEDOM”. Yes FREEDOM!!!! We could suddenly wear belts, not have to stand at attention when someone passes u. This new found freedom made many of us criminals in the main society. I personally know some people that were expelled from several schools because we did not want to follow the rules anymore. Others became “silent criminals”- U know the ones that have innocent faces but do stuff that the general society would not believe u would do if they looked at u at first glance. (I fell in this group) and it felt nice to get away with so many things that I did not think I would ever get away with. There was a very small group that I know that got ’saved’. (Hope they prayed for the rest of us). Freedom is one thing, I’ll never ever take for granted!
While we’re still at punishment what was with those teachers that would start all over whenever u let go the shoe laces and the canning hadn’t ended?
Shika maskio-This was mainly practiced by the CRE teacher. you squat but place your arms between your calf and thighs and still hold both of your ears for a whole period. Sometimes a double period. By the time the period ends, you look like you’ve been drinking because your eyes would be candy red with blood that drained to your eyes and the stagger for about 2 minutes before your hypothalamus centers North.
Wazi kala- the guy that brought those movies and went ahead to commentate. After every karate movie, most people used to meet nyuma ya Koinange. I also remember one time he brought “Terminator” and the following morning a bunch of mattresses and bedsheets filled the drying area. (He scared the bejeezus out of us and most of us didnt go out to pee at night. Ole wako if u slept in the lower deck). That reminds me, what was the deal with the toi’z not having doors? To know if someone was in or not u look at the hallway and if u dont see a hand holding some folded tissue then u know that’s an empty one (available for use).
Chicken pox- I was one of the unlucky ones that got this disease in standard 3. We had to walk to the Naivasha General Hosi, got some shots (those nurses were surprised that we were allergic to pain when dungaring those shots) and also some white, nasty smelling lotion that we had to apply. Picture this, take unga ya ngano and bury your face in it. Ok thats how we looked after the lotion is applied on your face. Plus you couldnt even comb your hair and arrggghhhh!
At Ease ! Attention! X 3 Kwani we were being prepared for the military!
Chobow mangoto and chobow ua! – sure death sentence by everyone.
Those birds that used to fly in a “V” formation every evening at the last parade and those that would chill for the others. This happened just before supper when the teacher on duty was yapping and you were just being absent minded.
Dimoh- Visiting days- 2nd best day of the term after ULO. Too bad some guys were only brought “Sunday Nation” but some of us, twas a real feast. By the time family leaves, you’ve puked, farted, cant close the top two buttons of the khaki shot and u are also “thefe-yaing” (worse than belching).
What the hell was is it with reading our letters? B4 u send and when u receive? Mine had to have “Things I need- and always included= atleast 10 chapos.”.
Fighting nyuma ya Koinange. I saw many fights and was a major catalyst.
Standing at attention when a grown up passes you. This is one rule I never really understood and I was so mad that after the first few days at home, I’d do that when I go to the local duka and my neighbours would wonder what was wrong with me.
Eating nguna. Call it desperation or homesick but when we left school on those “walks” some guyz who lived in Naivasha taught us how to eat nguna. U get a well rounded piece, place it on the ground and roll it under your “vunja”. This effectively removed the thorns and then u slice it up and ate the sweet brown part. Twas really mzuri but if you ate too much, u’d end up constipating seriously. By the way, nguna also made glue right ?
Going to the Nai show. Hahaha this needs a story on itself. The things that some guys did ai !
The T-9 incident during dimo. This was one scary incident that took place. All I can say is me and my family are grateful because that T-9 passed us but attacked a family that was next to ours.
Running away from school. I always contemplated, but was to chicken to do it. I however know Owour (cant remember his first name) did it several times and even made it to Nai before being brought back to school. This guy had guts!
Swimming in Lake Naivasha- This one needs a post on it’s own. hahahaha I know someone who lost their underwear to fish. Kweli taabu ya maji. Other guys stole fish from fisherman, others stole fruits from Delamare farm and many of us got “shocked” by the fence.
The bore hole incident.- hahaha I always think that borehole pump was stolen by a parent. Heck ! It was stolen on the night after dimo! They chopped up the nguna near the pump and just carried it away. Whoever it was did their research in the few hours dimo lasted.
La belle inn Hotel and other bakeries on closing day. For the rich folks, Belle Inn was the place to go immediately school closed. Lunch was mzuri for other people, there were other bakeries that had a sudden shortage of bread. I dont what it was with some people but they would always tell you that kisanga was the first thing they’d buy when they got out of school and they did.
The walk to raise money for the bore hole, ( karagita), This one also needs a post on it’s own but maybe not. All I know is I walked for 25 km in some funny places (Karagita) to raise money for the borehole that was stolen on a dimo night!
Hells gate and walking to the hills above Naivasha Maximum, Going to Olkaria- hahaha Hells gate was just a way for teachers to make us relax. On time we went there and J……(who lived in Naivasha) was busy ombaing tissue. (He didnt carry his but had to go) Jamaa disappeared immediately the bus stopped went to the bushes and did his thing. Since most guys were stingy with their tissue, he used some leaves ama grass coz huko hells gate only accacia trees and hard grass grew. Either way, he didnt talk to us for a week because we kept teasing him. Olkaria is one place I swore never to go back. Rotten eggs from miles away is how the place smells! I got a headache and all I can say is the people that work there have a high tolerance to smell.
Breaking people’s boxes (butterfly) and if you had the finesse, u zungusha a tiny wire and that padlock just pops ama u remove the hinge from behind and you open the box from the opposite side. I know most guys that used to break into people’s boxes were looking for money. (Because it was illegal to have it). Does anyone ever remember hiding money between those metal seams or in books where u slice the hard cover of a bible and reseal it and no matter how many times those teachers did their “checking” they never found it. They only found the money that fools would put inside their “Omo” boxes after pouring it all out. Which also makes me wonder why the hell did they do checking before the school closed?
Why did we have stickers inside the box for panadol, bayer etc? It was the inthing to do to be cool. The more stickers u had, the more cool u looked. I’ve never understood this !
What was it with “siesta”? I know most of us were forced to sleep but never really slept. We’d read novels or just chit chat. (I clearly remember this was the time to review those reso (wrestling) matches we’d watched during holidays. Anytime we talked about “bushwackers, earthquake, undertaker etc was so nice and for those that didnt have TV’s would be all ears.
In some cases, I remember they’d be debate. …haha. most prestigious ministry was “food” and whoever got it was always a clown.
Each teacher having a week on duty. Some teachers were good and it would be ok but on some teachers week to be on duty, damn! twas a straight up disaster. I remember “Cobra’s” week, this guy would go thru’ the back of the class and make his own list of noisemakers and then compare his list with that of the prefect. If they didnt match, even the prefect would be in trouble. His week was the most quiet. Other teachers were just funny. There was one Mr. Karanja. Deep voice that resonated whenever he said “Silence” He taught swa but just his whole character was fun. He walked “ten to two” and had his shirt unbuttoned to his chest but liked hitting the bottle. Some of us had crushes on “Arinyo”. We just loved this woman. uuummmmhhhh hhhhmmm!. God bless those wiggly diabs!
Kuficha food: chapo’s in files, biscuits huko juu ya window sill, kuku imeekwa kwa jwala mbili ama tatu then u tie with a string and throw in the pit. After dimo, asubuhi, mnang’ang’ana na dogi kwa pit.
The place closest to the gate that was always green and watered and was considered among the best places to sit yr family during dimo. Chocolate kwa tai yenye umevaa.
“half body” and when there was no water kuvuta maji from the mfereji. (some nyani’s used to spit inside just for madha!. Maji iki-come, ndo moja could do a laundry na bado utaoga nayo.
Kido- This was the warning sound if a teacher was around. All u had to say was kido and everyone would be in their best behaviour. This also reminds me how we used to prop the windows if you sat in a row closest to the door. U you could tell which teacher was coming from the staffroom, and also how far they were. At this moments, “kido” would do the magic.
Houses
Kenyatta 1 and 2, Karuri, Wang’ombe, Lenana, Koinange and Kihonge.
Now I dont know how this whole design came up but if u wet the bed, u slept closest to the door. So everyday when entering each dorm a strong pang of rich ammonia from urine would smather your nostrils and u had to make a quick decision. Move fast or dont enter the dorm altogether. Some of those “nyama choma” wire mesh beds were completed corroded by the urine so u can imagine how the mattresses looked like. Bad luck to u if u slept on the lower deck of a guy that’d urinated.
Staff-
Dawa (cateress) sparki (the cook who always wore gumboots and walked like a robot. Mfonyo- Watchi who wore some akala’s (and he wore them out) or gumboots. (I would never mess with this guy).Kungu- all meno’s were stained can u imagine meeting such a watchi? Mukoma- another cook who always wore gumboots. There was also another guy we called “chura” this guy wore gumboots also but u can understand why- Kazi yake ilikua kuosha choo. What about the guy who was a Kao, had one short leg than the other but used to ride the bike?
Teachers-
Mr. Njoroge,Mr. Kamunya, (headi). Mr. Ongoro (art teacher who always smelled like a kerosene stove) Mr. Mutembei (Music teacher drunk a lot and anytime time he talked, his breath was definately punctuated with whatever he’d had the previous nite. Played the hell out of a harmonica). Mr. Ndigirigi- Bila words for this guy.. Mr. Njoroge KG. (Upara deadly yet always did a catwalk in those “Ndirangu” boots). Mr. Mwangi es (S) with his famous quote- takuchapa unyabe fubay (nitakuchapa unyambe vumbi), Mr, Mundia- Cobra, Mr.Kimemia, Mr. Njuguna, Akinyi, Mr. Muchina (First body), Mr. Magoma, Mr Gicheru- with his afro, Mr. Karanja- This guy walked literally “ten to two” Mr. Kimani – “Karagae”, Ms. Ndegwa (Arinyo) Everyone loved this woman. Mr. Gitau another drunkard, Mrs. Gitau….Mr. Mwiti- Don’t get caught by his slaps. (this guy used to lose his temper and if you’re on the receiving end, he’d bout you. Mr. Merara- , Ms. Kabiru- she was ambidextrous (yes she could write with both hands so when writing those CRE notes ole wako kama if you cant catch up), Mr Gitonga, by the way, who was the woman we called “Futa jalon” (mdomo baggy), there was also another CRE teacher who used spit all the time (arrrggghhh!).
